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The Cycle of Loneliness and Mental Health Can Be Trying


My Emotions Were Getting the Best of Me


I've noticed Myself feeling an emotion that I hadn't dealt with in a long time lately; loneliness. It's been eating at Me in a way that I couldn't understand until this morning. It's not loneliness I really feel, it's disconnect, lack of community to be exact, if I wanted to pinpoint it.


For weeks, I've been getting sadder, sinking deeper into isolation and telling Myself that it was just seasonal depression settling in for the next few months. However, this morning, I was in church online and as the pastor was speaking, I felt she was speaking loudly in one ear, while God was speaking to Me in the other. He was whispering confirmations and telling Me that I was still on the right track, even though I feel so lost. I'm not lost, I'm in transition. Transition usually requires a level of isolation. Some transitions happen more gradually than others. The one that I'm currently in, has been going on for over a year. I think I'd be further along if I hadn't seen My near death experience last year as a downfall. I wish now, that I had seen it as a chance to revise My life and work because now, that's where I find Myself.


I spent way too long grieving a life that no longer existed. My health changed, My finances changed, along with My mobility and community. I refused to accept it and tried to keep being who I was before, expecting the life I had before.


I'm not the only one who has experienced something like this I'm sure. Loneliness and the things that come along with it, can feel like a never-ending cycle of struggle and strain for many. That's part of why I launched the STMS Community; not only did I go through a cycle of emotions that were constantly affecting My mental, emotional and physical health, but I noticed others around Me were dealing with similar struggles.



Mental Health Challenges Can Lead to Isolation and Dark Thoughts


There are so many ways that mental health challenges can affect our ability to build and maintain a community. Depression often brings a sense of emotional numbness or detachment, leading some to withdrawing from social situations because the effort of engaging feels overwhelming or pointless. I Myself, am more guilty of this than I like to acknowledge. I'm working on My rejection and abandonment issues though.


Sometimes, mental health challenges can lead to a low sense of self-worth; it can even make you feel like a burden to those who care for us the most. That sense of being a burden can even lead to not reaching out for help when in need. Fatigue, lack of motivation and negative coping mechanisms can also creep up and start to wreak havoc.


Feelings of inadequacy can make someone lose sense of their purpose, make the smallest task seem like hard work, as well as lead to mental and physical exhaustion.


There are even people who self-isolate as a way to protect themselves from perceived future pain. When you have a history of trauma, pain and depression, it's easy to put walls up around yourself. The problem comes when the mind starts to convince us that we were dismissed, instead of realizing we can tear down our wall anytime we're ready and let others in.


If you're trying to break out of a pattern of self-isolating or feeling isolated due to your mental health. There are some ways that you can try to slowly start to build a community for yourself.


  • If you want to reconnect with someone, start small by initiating a brief text, phone call, or low-pressure meetup with them. I know it can be scary, but it can be the first step on the road to rebuilding that relationship.

  • There are all kinds of social and community groups online; there's a group for everything. Whether you're looking for someone who can understand your mental health challenges or a group for hobbyists, there's a community waiting to welcome you.

  • Therapy is also a great opportunity to deal with the things in your past that contribute to your feelings of isolation.

  • For some people, medication may be needed and that's 100% okay. Some need it for a short time, some for longer. Both are okay.




Have you ever struggled with isolation or feelings of loneliness stemming from depression, anxiety or mental health challenges? How do you/did you cope with it? Did you find any particular methods of healing helpful? Feel free to share in the comments.


In our next blog, we will take a look at how isolation can affect those who are housebound or dealing with limited mobility. Subscribe to our blogs to keep up!





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